Monday, May 10, 2010

Dear Nose,

I'm sorry I take you for granted. I do appreciate the gooey reminder I've received. It's hard to ignore you when it suddenly feels like you have grown to take over my entire face. However with the scattering of gunk filled toilet paper tissue wads blanketing every flat surface of our home it's been impossibly hard to find the original source of the roll. Paper towels just don't have the pillowed softness of Charmin.
The gallon of O.J. I drank this morning was a relief thankfully, but I would ask that we can resolve this issue quickly so my Gourmet Mother's day cupcakes will stop tasting like foot when they look so gosh darn pretty. Again, please accept my apologies. I promise to pamper you with exfoliating masks, and never again say, "I would be a lot thinner if I didn't have taste buds".
(I thought you understood it was just a woman's bull-corn way to ensure she didn't enjoy sugared fatty snacks to the fullest).

Faithfully, Wishfully, and Worshiply Yours,

Jodi

P.S. Please be on the lookout for the rest of my head. It swam away yesterday and I have yet to find it.

2 comments:

Rachel said...

Poor Jodi! Being sick is miserable. I hope you get feeling better soon. If I see the rest of your head floating down the street in all this water we are getting, I will scoop it up and bring it right over!

Anonymous said...

Things are looking up in our house. Still stuffed to the hills but not nearly as close to death as before. I have been using a neti-pot, nasal rinse. I have to say it makes a nose happy. You should try it out for a good time.

Alesia